[00:00.62] Chapter 5: The Monster's Story.
[00:02.73] I am alive.
[00:06.91] When I first awoke, I felt light and darkness against my eyes without understanding what they were.
[00:13.19] Sounds jumbled in my head and made no sense.
[00:17.66] My hands touched things I could not name.
[00:22.69] Everything was new to me.
[00:25.03] The whole world was strange and confusing.
[00:29.79] There was just one being, a creature something like myself, who might help me, and that was you.
[00:38.39] But when I turned to you, you fled from me in disgust.
[00:44.65] I took some clothes, a few ill fitting garments and a large cloak, and found my way outside.
[00:54.12] Then I left the dismal place of my creation far behind.
[01:00.75] Now I know that it was night when I departed, but then I did not understand, and the darkness frightened me.
[01:11.71] I walked on until I came to a space where there were no buildings.
[01:16.35] Grass grew there, and trees stood silently under a silver disc in the black sky.
[01:24.73] There, I experienced fresh sensations.
[01:29.50] I discovered cold and hunger, and by taking berries from the trees and shrubs, I learned what it was to eat.
[01:41.71] After a while, I found the remains of a fire, left by some traveler, and saw first that it warmed me, and then that it filled me with pain when I tried to touch it.
[01:55.15] Thus, day by day, I traveled on, not knowing where I was going, and as I went, I taught myself about the things that were good for me, and the things that were harmful.
[02:09.58] I learned something about myself also.
[02:16.69] I came across people, other beings which I could see were almost like myself, or so I thought at first.
[02:27.87] When I approached them, though, I found that they did not consider me as one of their own kind.
[02:35.54] As soon as they saw me, their faces became twisted with fear.
[02:43.01] They shouted at me and threw things and ran away from me, just as my own maker had done.
[02:54.42] So this is what I learned about myself, that I was a disgusting creature.
[03:02.55] Even though I had given them no cause, all men hated me.
[03:11.01] Oh, Frankenstein, that was the hardest of all my lessons.
[03:17.79] How could I understand it?
[03:22.48] I soon came to see that, to save myself from being beaten and chased and abused, I must stay out of sight.
[03:33.94] I had to live my life in secret, cowering and hiding and living on scraps.
[03:43.85] So I traveled on, and eventually came across a cottage in the thick of the forest.
[03:51.28] It seemed a pleasant, tidy place, with a small garden in which there was a kind of rough shelter.
[03:59.94] I shall stay here, I thought.
[04:04.21] I shall live in this hovel of a shelter and look out for the people who belong to this cottage.
[04:12.75] If I keep myself out of sight, perhaps I can learn from them.
[04:21.52] The first person I saw there was a girl who passed by my hovel, carrying a pale of milk.
[04:29.52] I waited till she went into the cottage, and then approached as silently as I could.
[04:38.65] I found a gap in the wooden shutters and watched her a while through that.
[04:44.00] She was a pretty girl, and I thought I could see kindness in her face as she busied herself, sweeping and tidying the cottage.
[04:56.44] I longed to speak to her, to make myself known and to hear her say gentle things to me.
[05:04.55] But, of course, I knew this was impossible.
[05:09.33] People did not say gentle things to creatures like me.
[05:14.67] They ran from me, or tried to beat me.
[05:21.94] So I remained hidden and watched.
[05:27.99] Gradually, I came to know the others who shared the cottage with the girl, a young man of about her age, and an older man who seemed to be blind.
[05:40.07] It pleased me to see such attractive beings going about their simple business.
[05:46.69] They were not altogether happy, though.
[05:49.99] I was puzzled to see that sometimes the young man and his companion would weep together.
[05:59.86] Day by day, I watched them closely, and in that way learned many things.
[06:07.05] I saw how people could live together in peace and love, and I also began to understand the meanings of words, and the way that language worked.
[06:18.50] I discovered the names they used for each other.
[06:22.37] The older man was father, or Delacy.
[06:30.20] The other was Felix, or sometimes brother.
[06:38.16] And the girl sister, or Agatha.
[06:44.45] They named the things around them.
[06:48.14] Milk, and bread, and fire.
[06:55.65] And they had books which they read together in the evenings.
[07:03.73] If I can master their language, I thought, I can perhaps speak to them one day.
[07:12.25] And if they see that they have no need to fear me, then surely they will accept me and include me in their happiness.
[07:21.96] My little family was not wealthy.
[07:26.32] Indeed, food and fuel were hard to come by, especially when the winds began to blow colder and the snows came.
[07:39.09] Felix and his sister sometimes went without food so that there was enough for the old man to eat.
[07:50.48] So I took to helping them in secret.
[07:54.89] I would collect wood for them to burn, and leave it near the cottage when they were away.
[08:04.49] It amazed them to come across my offering, and they puzzled over where it might have come from.
[08:11.55] They were glad enough of it, though, and I felt so happy to see that my efforts brought them comfort.
[08:19.85] When the spring came, I was surprised to see a visitor arrive at the cottage.
[08:26.86] She was a dark-haired, pretty girl named Safie.
[08:34.90] The whole family was delighted to see her, but Felix especially.
[08:43.68] So now I understood the reason why he had sometimes wept.
[08:49.61] He was in love with Safie and had been parted from her.
[08:57.32] I watched and listened and so learned their story.
[09:02.68] Safie came from a distant land, a place called Turkey.
[09:09.50] It was there that she and Felix met and fell in love.
[09:18.31] They wanted to marry, but Safie's parents would not agree to it.
[09:25.17] At that time, Turkey was at war with France, and Safie's father was captured and thrown in prison.
[09:37.75] It was Felix who helped him to escape.
[09:42.15] When the French learned of this, they took all Delacy's money and land, and the family had to flee for their lives.
[09:54.61] That was why they came to live in that poor cottage in the woods.
[09:59.50] When Safie found out where they were, she came to join them.
[10:06.95] To begin with, Safie found it hard to understand everything the others said to her.
[10:13.86] So Felix began to teach her.
[10:17.39] He explained the meanings of words and showed her books with stories in them.
[10:24.22] They studied like this every day, and gradually, Safie learned to speak and read.
[10:36.58] I knew a little about books, for I had found one in the pocket of your cloak.
[10:42.85] Of course, it meant nothing to me at first, just paper and strange marks.
[10:52.40] But as I followed Safie's lessons with Felix, I came to understand that the marks stood for words.
[11:04.70] I sat for many long hours with your book, struggling to make sense of it, and slowly, it began to yield its meanings.
[11:16.11] They were your words, Frankenstein.
[11:20.76] The book was your diary, and it told of your feelings as you set about the work you had started.
[11:29.46] You know it, Frankenstein.
[11:33.44] You know what you wrote.
[11:37.60] Oh, what am I doing by creating this monster?
[11:43.50] It is horrible, horrible.
[11:50.48] Can you imagine what I felt as these words became clear to me?
[11:56.63] My own master hated me.
[12:01.34] Can you imagine how I howled in anguish to the empty forest?
[12:11.57] But I had now seen other men, and I knew they were not all like you.
[12:17.40] This happy family in the cottage was capable of love.
[12:24.82] The thought that I too might speak to them and be happy one day filled me with hope, but it was a hope that did not last.
[12:34.83] While I was wandering alone in the forest, I came across a pool of still water and knelt down to drink.
[12:47.74] There, suddenly, I saw my own face reflected, and the sight of it made me shrink back in horror.
[12:57.17] This was the face my own creator despised.
[13:03.90] How could I, who was so hideous, ever speak to my secret friends, who were so graceful and lovely to look upon.
[13:18.17] What am I?
[13:22.02] What creature am I?
[13:27.31] I cried aloud.
[13:29.95] But the only answers that came to me were my own groans of despair.
[13:36.88] For a long time, these thoughts tormented me and almost destroyed my dreams of companionship.
[13:45.78] I could not win friends because anyone who met me would recoil from my ugliness.
[13:53.57] I had no choice but to spend my life in hateful loneliness.
[14:01.96] Then, from out of this darkness, I glimpsed a faint light of new hope, and I realized that there might be a way after all.
[14:14.38] Mr. Delacy, the old man, was blind.
[14:21.17] He would feel no disgust or fear because he could not see me.
[14:29.44] If I can only speak to him, I thought, he will not take me for a monster.
[14:38.00] He will only hear my voice.
[14:41.47] I will be able to tell him my story, and he will understand.
[14:54.27] I was delighted with my plan.
[14:58.39] Once Mr. Delacy knew that there was some good in me, that I had helped his family and meant them no harm, he could persuade the others to accept me.
[15:11.39] So I waited for a day when Felix, Agatha, and Safie were away from the cottage.
[15:19.15] Then, with my heart beating quickly, I went up to the door.
[15:26.51] I hesitated a moment, knowing that my future happiness depended on the next few minutes.
[15:36.10] I had to explain all that had happened to me from beginning to end, and trust that this kind old man would then help to bring some comfort to my life.
[15:50.04] I knocked on the door, and, after a while, heard a voice call back.